triggering binge.
oh yeah, she was takin me over, and oh yeah, it was the start of the summer

saw ash live. *swoon*.

they've been touring america for the past year and they sounded vaguely amused about it. like they've been popular for years and they bother to drag their ass to the states and probably are going to get either insanely popular or forgotten. but they're too good a band to get forgotten. which sort of sucks. just lucky they're such a well-established band that they won't get ruined. pfft.

so i had a major binge today. totally out of control. i usually don't write my binges down because i feel ashamed of them and proud of my ana stages, which i know is fucked, but i'll say it now. i have got to understand why i do it to stop fucking doing it. little warped fucker.

so i ate...

  • a small pasta pot thing.
  • 2 pieces of crispbread.
  • a pickles sandwich.
  • packet of crisps.
  • hot tea.
  • piece of bread and jam.
  • a spoonful of chocolate spread.
  • half a slice of coffee cake.
  • a peach
  • three gingernut biscuits.
  • a bowl of cornflakes.
  • hot tea.

    jesus christ. you can see how mindless it was. sometimes i binge on the same foods. it's safer. even my parents have picked up on it, it's like they can almost tell when i'm going to binge. i go for a bowl of cereal, then another, then another, then they tell me to fucking stop eating and i realise what i'm doing and i run upstairs and purge. yeeeeeeeehaw.

    smack.

    2002-08-27 - 6:59 p.m.
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